Whether its the portal of a couple in your favorite rom-com or a high-profile celebrity romance, toxic traits within relationships are often romanticised in today’s society. Although, finding yourself in a toxic relationship can be detrimental both to your mental health and emotional wellbeing. Relationship expert Ness Cooper at The Sex Consultant reveals the key warning signs of a toxic relationship and how to recover from being exposed to one.
Here are those key warning signs you are in a toxic relationship
1. There is no room for you to be yourself
The relationship can be very one-sided and controlling making you feel isolated. When you do try and be yourself, your partner may display toxic jealousy.
2. Boundaries are regularly overstepped
When raising issues around boundaries not being listened to, you’re often ignored or your partner reacts negatively in toxic ways such as retaliation.
3. They put you down even during moments you deserve praise.
They make you doubt your own abilities and this leads to reduced confidence and self-esteem.
4. They aren’t dependable when you need them
When they let you down they will make out it’s something you did and will not take responsibility for their actions.
5. Lack of communication or the type of communication
Conversations can often be focused in one direction with elements of control or love bombing. This communication doesn’t allow you to learn about each other on a deeper level, and they will avoid personal questions.
What if you find yourself in a toxic relationship… How do you leave one?
1. Plan ahead and build a network you can rely on.
This will help you work out what actions you need to take regarding money, where to stay, childcare, and more, for when you are ready to leave.
2. Talk to someone you trust about the situation.
Having someone on your side who knows how the toxic relationship has affected you can really help. If you’re struggling to reach out to a friend or family, seek help from a therapist or support charity. This will also keep all conversations and reasons behind them confidential.
3. Re-establish boundaries and stick them.
Focus on setting up boundaries and rules for when you part ways. This can be even more important if you have joint obligations and commitments that can’t finish even after ending the relationship, such as co-parenting.
4. Learn to do more things for yourself.
Focusing on adding in more things for yourself will help you gain stronger self-esteem and better confidence. This will help you move on from the relationship.
5. Cut all unnecessary communication and interactions.
Whilst some forms of communication and interactions may need to continue after the relationship ends, you don’t owe them any other forms of interaction. When you give them more opportunities into your new world through unneeded communication and interactions it can lead to you reliving the toxic elements of the past relationship.
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