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’Tis the season to be jolly, but this is not always true for your sex life. With festive parties, family gatherings, and last-minute shopping, it can be hard to keep things spicy in the bedroom. 

In fact, Stanford University researchers have found that people tend to have less sex during December. Thankfully, you don’t have to be a Grinch when it comes to your sex life, and you can still get your groove on during the holidays.

A Guide To A Spicy Sex Life During The Holidays

1. Let’s talk about sex, baby

You can’t have a healthy sex life without healthy communication. 

Interest in sex tends to wane for different reasons, so it is important to be able to communicate your expectations or problems, with your partner freely. 

The festive season would also be a great time to chat about your fantasies, and to also be open to hearing from those of your partner. It’s critical to remember that you don’t have to engage in your partner’s fantasies if they make you uncomfortable, and you need to be clear about this and respect if they don’t wish to engage in yours.

It’s likely that both you and your partner will be willing to try at least one of your respective fantasies, so have fun!

2. Don’t overextend yourself

Holidays are typically filled with stress, often due to a long list of obligations, which leaves little time for yourself or your partner. 

So, just remember that it’s perfectly fine to say no to some things in order to create space for yourself and your relationship. Use the free time to go on a date night and spend some quality time.  

3. Festive Sexting

One great way to keep this sexy during the festive season is by entertaining each other with some sexual banter over text, or even email. 

You can send your partner a fiery text of what’s to come later in the evening, or you can reminisce on past sexy experiences. Doing so will definitely add some excitement to your day.

4. Make Sexy Gifts 

’Tis the season for gifting, and a healthy sex life is a pretty great gift. 

Maybe gift a new sex toy that your partner can enjoy with and without you, or sexy lingerie?

You can also gift experiences like sensual massages or “sex vouchers” that have you doing your favorite sexual activities, or anything related to it. 

5. Book a room 

The bedroom isn’t the only place to enjoy an illicit rendezvous.

 The kitchen table? Or the shower? Or even better, if the house is crowded with relatives and friends, try booking a hotel room for a few hours during the day and making the most of it.

6. Set the festive mood

If you really want to set the mood and enhance the time with your partner, might we suggest using candles? 

Doing so will definitely enhance the intimacy, and you can also incorporate some slow, romantic music and rose petals all over the room. 

7. Festive Foreplay

Foreplay not only increases intimacy, but it can also increase pleasurable orgasms. 


Viki_B / 9242/Pixabay

Foreplay doesn’t always have to be sexual, as massages can also work to increase libido and intimacy. So, don’t rush trying to get to your gift, but try spending some extra time unwrapping it instead.

8. Festive Sex Toys

Why not spend the festive season introducing something new to your bedroom antics?

It doesn’t have to be as intense as a vibrator, as silk blindfolds and even handcuffs can heighten your senses, and elevate your pleasure. 

9. Play Dress Up

Why not set the mood by adding some festive fantasy to your bedroom?

Whether it’s dressing up as Mrs. or Mr. Claus, a sexy fireman, or a helpful nurse, embracing a new character in the bedroom can heighten your and your partner’s sexual fantasy.

10. Stay fit

Understandably, the last thing you may want during the holidays is to stay active, but staying fit can make a big difference to your life and your sexual health, 

“You can bear your body weight better, and you won’t tire as quickly, so being fit may mean you’ll enjoy sex more and probably have your partner enjoy it more, too,” says Dr. Bianca Rucker, a Vancouver-based sex and relationship therapist and registered nurse, to Canadian Living.

Dr. Rucker adds that staying fit can also improve your body image, which can equate to you feeling more sexual. 

Now, you don’t have to join a gym during the festive season, but try staying on top of your usual routine or at least having the occasional dance party in your home.  

11. Eat holiday aphrodisiacs

The festive season is all about dietary indulgence, so why not include some foods that can keep things spicy in the bedroom?

Dark chocolate, strawberries, honey, and asparagus are each edible foods, and they’re also healthy for the body. Avocados are another food that can get you in the mood, especially because avocados promote a healthy heart, which is essential for healthy sex. 

You can also do some snacking on fresh berries, seeds, and nuts as they can also boost libido.

12. Avoid sex-poor foods

If you really want to maintain a healthy sex life this festive season, might we recommend monitoring your alcohol intake? Alcohol dehydrates the body, and this makes lubrication and a healthy erection more difficult, which then makes the chance of reaching orgasm an even harder battle. 

13. See your doctor

Regular check-ups are important, and they’re not just limited to your blood sugar and cholesterol levels. 

You should be able to speak to your doctor about anything, and that includes sex-related issues, like sex being painful and erectile dysfunction. 

Having problems in the bedroom is nothing to be ashamed of, so stop procrastinating and make an appointment. 

It’s the most wonderful time of the year, and this can also be said for your sex life, so take the necessary steps to enjoy all your time under the mistletoe. 

Have a sexy festive season!


L. Symul, P. Hsieh, A. Shea, CRC. Moreno, D.J. Skene, S. Holmes, M. Martinez. (2020). Unmasking Seasonal Cycles in Human Fertility: How holiday sex and fertility cycles shape birth seasonality.medRxiv. doi:

Paterson, L. Q., Jin, E. S., Amsel, R., & Binik, Y. M. (2014). Gender similarities and differences in sexual arousal, desire, and orgasmic pleasure in the laboratory. Journal of sex research51(7), 801–813.

MAIN IMAGE CREDIT: Photo by Katerina Holmes/Pexels 
Pie Mulumba

Pie Mulumba

Pie Mulumba is a journalist graduate and writer, specializing in health, beauty, and wellness. She also has a passion for poetry, equality, and natural hair. Identifiable by either her large afro or colorful locks, Pie aspires to provide the latest information on how one can adopt a healthy lifestyle and leave a more equitable society behind.


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